Necessary Evil

pillshotWhen it comes to managing an illness, the very medicine that adds comfort  and control to life can also strip away longevity. It is disappointing to think about how the medication that you swallow or inject into your body can be slowly killing you while at the same time it is adding value to your well-being in the short term. In order to live a better life, taking the potent poison becomes a necessary evil.

However, on a positive note, medicine is evolving all the time. Hopefully advances will be able to cure diseases and omit the need for drugs while correcting any damage done from taking medicine. I have been injecting and swallowing poisons since I was a child as a means to cope with rhuematoid arthritis.  It scares me to think what is happening to my body when I take something that is supposed to be helping me. At the same time I can’t let the RA continue to attack my joints and potentially cripple my valuable, active lifestyle.

The best way I deal with this issue is by trying to take care of what I do have. Take a look around at the people that abuse their health with excessive alcohol, smoking, or bad food. They are no healthier than I am. I focus on being happy and putting value to the life that I have. I have no choice but to put my fear aside and hope that my efforts will pay off. If I live with a positive attitude then I will get more out of my time alive then I ever will if I sulk and wonder what if.

It’s not that I never get worried about how the disease is controlling my fate or if I’m trading one evil for another. I have to clench my teeth and swallow my pride when I see my knuckles swell. Some of the scary thoughts that worry me I have to push away because I refuse to let them control me. Surrounding myself with supportive and caring people is one of the best ways to fight off the necessary evils in life. No matter who you are or what you are dealing with, there comes a time when you have to make decisions that will leave you wondering “what if?” Don’t live in the “what ifs” of life because the “what it is” of life is waiting for you to make the most of it. -pm

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